Birth Reflections

Only one of my children have a birth mark. Aiden has a light brown oval spot on his right side. 

However, Blake had this spot on his right foot. It looks like a cigarette burn on the skin. The doctor didn't know what is was, but it is healing and fading very slowly.

God had given us this treasure of family, but I need to remember they are His. I give God my family. After all He loves them more than I could. Going through a situation where things do not turn out like you think they will reminds you of that.

Some people have made comments or asked questions of Matt about our home birth in such a way that made him question if our decision is to blame for the trouble we had. Should we have made better choices? Was there someone to blame? Us frail humans want someone to blame don't we?
I thank God for the choices we have made through this entire process. God led us to a home birth with our specific midwife. You know a home birth was not even an option at the beginning of my pregnancy. My mother birthed my youngest two siblings at home and has suggested it to us, but I didn't want to. You need to feel compelled to do something like this and prepare for it. So the concept was not foreign to me. The only way I even considered it was because Aiden was such a fast delivery.
From start to finish Aiden was born in five hours and the drive to the hospital was horrible.

There were some factors about my birth and hospital delivery that pushed me to look for another place to deliver and after watching my sister give birth, being an objective observer, that pushed me to really consider a home birth. Also the fact that my nurse midwife at Floyd had delivered at home with her last baby I knew there was something to it. God kept pointing me in this direction. I kept meeting people that had chosen a home birth and ironically all of them were in the medical field. So I know they had quite a bit more information to make this informed choice.

We had a good pregnancy and I am convinced that if we had delivered at a hospital they would have pushed us into a c-section delivery. This is not the delivery I wanted. I know that I would have caved at the hospital and asked for drugs, that would have lead to me not being able to push Blake out, that would have lead to him getting stuck or us rushing to a c-section. God had this.

I did not tear in delivery, Blake was able to be delivered naturally, no shoulder distotia. There was nothing we could have done differently to have my placenta cooperate. There was no reason why it didn't release. No one was at blame for Blake getting pneumonia. God knows he was squeezed through the birth canal, so how could he have breathed in fluid and get an infection in his lungs. I don't know why these things happened, but there is no blame. We live a fragile life and things happen.

I am so thankful that the people surrounding me knew the right things to do at the right time. We live right next to the hospital. Our care was timely and ready at a short notice. I have had quite the experience and such a story to tell. Even now looking back there is nothing I would have done differently. I would still have a home birth had I to do it all over again.

Perhaps a more conscious effort to walk everyday and eat a few more salads would have been better choices but God is good and takes care of us always.

 My baby is beyond perfect and the dimple I found on his cheek has been probably worn there by my kissing his irresistible soft cheek. I love to talk about my experience and my baby ask us questions anytime. :)